


With Affection, I Promise

by jannika



Series: Putting Down Roots [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-06
Updated: 2012-09-06
Packaged: 2017-11-20 03:06:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/580605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jannika/pseuds/jannika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A sequel to Cold Gym Floor Honeymoons in which Zayn gets a new tattoo and tells Liam some stories, Liam tries to understand, Niall sometimes feels out numbered, Harry and Louis find themselves living out a classic story, and the five of them make new traditions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With Affection, I Promise

**Author's Note:**

> Because, remember when I said I would write a sequel to the marching band AU? Apparently what I meant was, 'multiple sequels' including this one which takes place around the holidays and despite being 13,000 words long resolves _nothing_ and in fact opens up new things I need to resolve in the next sequel. This verse is a monster. There will be more. With love and thanks as always to the Liam to my Zayn and my very favorite girl, [](http://folkloric-feel.livejournal.com/profile)[**folkloric_feel**](http://folkloric-feel.livejournal.com/) and also to both [](http://aimmyarrowshigh.livejournal.com/profile)[**aimmyarrowshigh**](http://aimmyarrowshigh.livejournal.com/) and [](http://dangerbears.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://dangerbears.livejournal.com/)**dangerbears** who had to listen to me complain about all the anxiety I was having about this part and who are generally wonderful.

 

It's one of those weirdly warm days in late November, warm enough that Zayn had left his jacket in his locker and that they've got the windows open in Liam's room as they sit on his bed watching _Sky High._ There's a slight breeze, but only enough to make Zayn want to sink farther into Liam, which he wanted to do anyway. They're stretched out on the bed, leaning against Liam's headboard and Zayn's backpack and school stuff thrown on the floor. They'd been planning to get coffee and study together at the Starbucks between their houses, but then they'd gotten to talking about this movie in study hall and since both Liam's parents work late on Thursdays, it had ended up seeming like a much better plan than studying.

"I actually don't know how we've never watched this movie together until right now," Liam says as Will's ending narration pops up on screen.

"Agreed," Zayn says.

"I watched this like, twice a week in middle school," Liam says.

"Me too," Zayn admits, then he grins, "more than watched it, actually."

"What?"

"I'll show you," Zayn says, reaching for his bag on Liam's floor and pulling out his laptop. Liam raises his eyebrows, looking puzzled.

"Show me what?" Liam asks.

"Something I haven't told you before, hang on," Zayn says, pulling up an internet window when his laptop wakes up.

"Something you haven't told me before that you're showing me on the internet?" Liam asks.

"Yup," Zayn says.

"Your secret porn career?" Liam says, smirking.

"Yes, you found me out," Zayn says back, opening his bookmarks and scrolling to one he hasn't actually pulled up in over a year.

"I knew it!" Liam says. Zayn grins and turns his screen to face Liam, blushing a little.

"I did know you that you draw, actually," Liam says, warm and little teasing as he stares at the screen. Zayn bites back a grin at the fact that Liam recognizes his work without being told and waits for Liam to get what he's seeing. "Wait. Is that?" Liam says after a minute.

"See how this links back to the movie a little better than porn career?" Zayn asks. Liam arches an eyebrow.

"This is fanart," Liam says.

"I know," Zayn says.

"Is there just the one, or?" Liam asks.

"There's a whole folder, actually? On the side?" Zayn says, blushing. Liam scrolls over and clicks, eyes going wide at the thumbnails Zayn knows he's seeing.

"Oh my god," Liam says.

"I know," Zayn says.

"How long ago did you do these?" Liam asks.

"End of 8th grade? Beginning of freshman year? I was fourteen," Zayn says.

"Some of these are awfully close to a porn career, actually," Liam says. Zayn kicks his leg a little.

"Hey," he says. Liam grins at him.

"So you were like, fourteen and sitting in your room drawing Will and Warren fanart, huh?" Liam asks.

"They're fighting crime in some of them," Zayn defends.

"Not most," Liam says. Zayn shrugs.

"It was fun?" He says. Liam laughs again,

"Would you be offended if I told you this is mostly just adorable?" Liam asks.

"I don't think anyone has referred to me as adorable in about a decade," Zayn says.

"I could do it more often, if you wanted," Liam says.

"I think I'm good," Zayn says, sort of beaming. This is one of the things about Liam, one of things were like, if Zayn had ever thought about dating someone and telling them about himself, this wouldn't have seemed like a thing worth bringing up at all, but Liam gets it and Zayn knew he would from the moment Liam had suggested they skip studying to watch the movie.

"I think I should probably find this like, vaguely reassuring or something too, right?" Liam says.

"What?" Zayn asks.

"Well, thinking about it, I'm clearly the Will, right? I mean, if you were fourteen and thinking things like this about them, then. I think I like that," Liam says. Seriously, sometimes Zayn doesn't actually understand how Liam is an actual person when he says things like this, things that make Zayn's pulse and his brain go a little haywire, things that make him feel warm and content and just good.

"You should," Zayn says, leaning forward to kiss Liam softly.

"So, other than your DeviantArt account here, tell me something else I don't know about you?" Liam requests. He's been doing this a lot lately, ever since they got back from nationals and he'd crawled into Zayn's room to apologize for not wanting to hear his Louis story and to reassure him that he wants to hear everything else Zayn is willing to tell him.

"Your fact of the day?" Zayn asks.

"Yes," Liam says.

"You already got one," Zayn says.

"I'm feeling greedy today," Liam says. Zayn grins and thinks for a moment, shaking his head before he talks,

"Okay, I don't think I've told you that I was barely born here, have I?" Zayn asks. Liam furrows his brow

"What do you mean?" Liam asks.

"My parents moved here from England a few months after they got married, and I was born like, six months later? So I was born here, but not by much?" Zayn says.

"No, you've never told me that one," Liam says, smiling, "I've heard both your parents talk, obviously, but I always assumed they like came over here for school and met that way or something," Liam says.

"Yeah, other than my one aunt and her kids, my whole family still lives over there. I've been a few times," Zayn says.

"We should go someday," Liam says. Zayn grins and leans forward to kiss him again, trying to get as close to Liam as he can without knocking the laptop over.

"Sure," he says, and the thing is he knows Liam means it, Liam always means it. Liam pulls back a little and closes the laptop and puts it down and then pulls Zayn on top of him properly.

"Why not?" he says against Zayn's lips, smiling and grabbing a handful of Zayn's shirt as he talks.

"Someday," Zayn hears himself echoing. Sometimes when Liam says these things and he means them so much, all the little warning bells in Zayn's head that usually shout about how young they are and how this is high school and how he doesn't even know where they'll be come next August just mute, and he feels himself believing them, too. He's got a hand in Liam's hair when the movie's credits die out and in the silence they can faintly hear the sounds of a radio coming through the window. The voice on the radio is saying something that Zayn doesn't quite catch, but that makes Liam wince underneath him.

"Sorry," he says.

"The neighbor?" Zayn asks, remembering that conversation they'd had over the summer.

"I'm. Sorry," Liam says again. Zayn shakes his head and reaches in his pocket, pulling out his phone and opening a playlist. He turns the volume way up and tosses it on Liam's nightstand.

"Ignore it and keep kissing me?" he says. Liam bites his lip, but grins.

"Only kissing you?" he asks.

"What else did you have in mind?" Zayn asks, smirking. Liam pulls him back down again and snakes a hand into his shirt this time, running his fingers all over Zayn's skin and grinning. Zayn grins back and slots their legs together, tugging Liam up by the belt loops even as he sinks down into him. So much better than studying all afternoon, really.

Liam offers to walk Zayn home after, when they're dressed again and they've packed Zayn's stuff back up.

"I'd drive you, but it's so nice," Liam says.

"It is," Zayn agrees as they head out Liam's front door. They start down the driveway and onto the sidewalk and then Liam sort of freezes and a voice from the next porch over calls out, drunkenly,

"What is this?" and Zayn feels eyes staring them down.

"Fuck," Liam says.

"Just walk," Zayn says, wanting to put a hand on Liam's back to guide him, to get him down the sidewalk and away, but pretty sure that wouldn't help them any at all here.

"This is a good Christian neighborhood, you know!" the guy slurs. Zayn can see as they get closer that he still has a bottle of some sort in his hand, taking swigs and glaring at them, radio still on from inside his house.

"Oh my god," Liam says.

"We have standards around here," the guy yells, taking another huge gulp of whatever he's drinking.

"I think being drunk in public is against them," Liam mutters to Zayn, looking really angry.

"What was that? I see you muttering down there, probably planning to blow the whole neighborhood up or something, fuck. Do your parents know the company you keep, kid?" The guy asks. Liam stiffens so much he slows down his walk. His face is red and he looks furious.

"Let it go, Li," Zayn says under his breath, they're almost past the porch now, almost far enough away that this isn't happening anymore. Zayn wills Liam to talk faster.

"Having fucking terrorist meetings in his bedroom, I know it," the guy slurs after them. They turn the corner after that, thankfully. They head around the corner and towards Zayn's and away from that.

"Holy shit, fuck, I'm sorry," Liam says, still red and with angry eyes.

"It's fine," Zayn says.

"No, it's not fine at all," Liam says. Zayn shrugs.

"He was drunk," Zayn says. Today was such a good day, it was one of the best afternoons Zayn can remember, and Zayn hates that they'll probably always remember it for this now. For the first time Liam was there when bullshit like this happened. Zayn doesn't want that, doesn’t want to let some drunk asshole have destroyed their day.

"That doesn't! How are you not like, furious? I mean, I should have like, said something, or like, I don't know, but are you okay?" Liam asks.

"You shouldn't have, trust me," Zayn says.

"But that's, I mean, that’s not okay," Liam says. Zayn sighs and turns his head a little to look at Liam.

"It's whatever, it's done now, right? And I'm fine," Zayn says. Liam frowns.

"Do you want me to just drop it?" Liam asks.

"Yes," Zayn says. He doesn’t want to do this right now, he doesn't want to have this conversation, talk about people like that, remember so much of why he needs to get the fuck out of this town. Not today, and not with Liam. Not right now.

"I'm just, I mean, I'm so, are you sure you're okay?" Liam asks.

"I promise," Zayn says. Liam gives him another really concerned look, but then shrinks down a little like he's relenting.

"I'm still sorry," he says.

"I know, but it's not your fault," Zayn says.

"But I still am," Liam says. Zayn nods and, in spite of everything, lets himself fantasize for a minute about college and cities and Liam being there with him. He knows moving isn't a magic fix that will make it so he never has to hear anything hateful ever again, but he also knows it will be better. He also knows the odds of there being a time when he's off next year and Liam is there and they're still together probably aren't the greatest, but for a minute he lets himself think about it anyway. He needs it right now.

***

That Sunday there is a large cake in Louis' dining room with _'congratulations to our champions!'_ written in icing and decorated with little sugar band instruments and school colors. Harry's mom and Louis' mom had gotten together to plan this, and there are also decorations and a sandwich spread and fruit tray and several sorts of macaroni and potato salads and younger siblings running around everywhere. The warm weather has held and the doors to Louis' backyard are open, people spilling in and out as the day goes on. Harry's sister Gemma had stopped by earlier in the day and she and Zayn had talked about the Art Insistute for almost an hour, reaffirming just how much Zayn wants to go. Zayn's sisters are running around with Louis' sisters in the backyard and most of the parents are sipping wine and debating whether or not it's time to cut into the cake.

Zayn is sitting in a chair watching Liam, Niall and Harry try to lead a game of some sort in the yard and thinking. Liam keeps casting him all these concerned looks and he appreciates it, he does, but he just doesn't want to talk about anything. They didn't really talk much on Friday during school, and Liam had been an intensive track practice all day on Saturday and Zayn had sort of hoped it would have just blown over by now, but every time Liam shoots him a concerned look he feels terrible all over again. He keeps thinking himself in spirals, about how he just doesn't want to let assholes like that take up any of their time at all, but then he thinks that it happened to Liam too and so maybe they should talk about it, except that it's been happening to him in varying degrees his whole life and just because it's new for Liam doesn't mean he needs to make a bigger deal about than he ever does, but then he thinks that if Liam hadn't been walking with him he never would have had to hear things like that in the first place. It's all circular and doesn't get him anywhere at all, but he can't help it.

He's watching something that appears to be Red Light, Green Light outside when Louis slides down beside him, squeezing in even though the chair isn't really big enough for both of them.

"What's with you today?" Louis asks.

"What do you mean?" Zayn asks.

"You're all brooding and shit, what's up?" Louis says.

"I am not brooding," Zayn says, shoving Louis a little. Louis raises an eyebrow.

"Yes, you are. You're brooding and Liam looks jittery," Louis says.

"Whatever," Zayn says. Louis sighs.

"Do I have to have a stern talking to with Liam? Are you having a lover's quarrel?" Louis asks.

"Shut up, Louis," Zayn says.

"Seriously, you're sitting in a room alone while our sisters might have actually killed Niall outside," Louis says, gesturing outside to where there is a little girl pile up three high on Niall on the lawn. Harry picks Phoebe up off Niall and spins her around while Liam laughs and tries to get everyone else off and running after him again.

"He's good," Zayn says, "And you're in here too."

"I was sent to find you. You were missing and your mom thought maybe you were still talking to Gemma but then H said that Gemma'd left and my mom said she hasn't seen you all day and she wants to congratulate you on the scholarship and all and so here I am," Louis says, "So tell me why you're all broody?"

"I'm, there was a thing the other night," Zayn says. Louis frowns.

"Be a tad more specific there, maybe?" Louis asks. Zayn sighs.

"He's got this asshole neighbor and he was drinking on his porch when Liam walked me home on Thursday, he yelled drunk asshole things at us," Zayn says. Louis winces.

"Fuck, I'm sorry," Louis says.

"Whatever," Zayn repeats.

"At both of you?" Louis says, emphasizing _'both.'_

"Me," Zayn says, "Well, I mean, at Liam for letting someone like me in his house, but at me."

"Fuck," Louis says again.

"Yeah well, it was bound to happen sooner or later, right?" Zayn says. "Just reminds me of how much I hate it here."

"Zayn," Louis says.

"I mean, it would have been better if like, I mean, if Liam has to, if had been like, an offensive joke or a rude cashier or something a little smaller, but. Whatever," Zayn says. Louis bites his lip and regards Zayn seriously.

"Yeah," Louis says, "that really sucks, that really fucking sucks, but I'm still not sure why you're sitting in the house alone."

"Liam was so angry and he like, wants to talk about it, and I just don't. I don't want to waste time talking about some drunk fucking asshole," Zayn says.

"So you thought you'd waste your time sitting inside and not talking to him at all?" Louis says. Zayn opens his mouth and then shuts it again. That's probably a really, really good point. He sort of hates when Louis makes those.

"He keeps looking at me all concerned, though," Zayn says.

"So go talk to him about something else. Anything else. My birthday, the filthy things you're going to do him later, whatever you would have talked him about today if not for that guy," Louis says.

"That actually makes a lot of sense," Zayn says, scowling a little.

"I know, sometimes I surprise myself," Louis says.

"You know I hate when you're right about things," Zayn says. Louis grins.

"So you're getting off this chair now, then?"

"I guess," Zayn says.

"You have to let my mom fawn over you first, I don't think she's cutting the cake until she hugs you," Louis says.

"I'm up," Zayn says, pushing himself by the chair arm on one side and Louis' thigh on the other, smirking a little as he stands up and says, "by the way, I'm pretty sure Lottie staring at Niall and blushing earlier. You might want to have a talk with that one about her taste in boys."

"You are the actual worst person alive and I hate you," Louis says.

"Just thought you should know," Zayn grins, he heads towards the door, and then pauses, "Thanks."

"Go," Louis says, grinning at him. Zayn heads off toward the kitchen, an idea forming in his head about exactly what he wants to say to Liam as he does. He finds Louis' mom pulling more lemonade out of the fridge.

"Can I help?" he asks. She turns around and beams at him.

"There you are!" she says, putting the lemonade on the counter and pulling him into a massive hug.

"Hi," he says.

"Congratulations, honey," she says, pulling back and transferring the lemonade from the store container into a plastic one covered with paint that Zayn recognizes as having been decorated by Louis in fifth grade art class.

"Thank you," Zayn says.

"I'm proud of you, you know," she says.

"It is pretty cool, I guess," Zayn says.

"It's more than pretty cool," she says, smiling.

"Yeah," Zayn says, shrugging but grinning.

"I told Louis I wasn't cutting cake until I saw you," she smiles.

"I heard," Zayn says. Louis' mom was the first adult who wasn't related to him or a teacher he ever had a conversation with. She's been trying to get him to call her by her first name for years, but no matter how many times she's said _Call me Jay, sweetheart_ in Zayn's head she's always _Louis' mom._ Still, she's been pulling him aside for little talks and checking in on his life for years and Zayn has gotten used to that, even if he still hears himself tripping over what to call her when they talk. She was also the first, and still one of the only, adults to know anything about his sexuality, mostly because she'd caught him and Louis making out once and had been, in retrospect, sort of amazing about it all. It's another one of those things that ties him to Louis in a million ways, another way so much of his childhood and so many of his memories are tangled in Louis.

"So," she says, putting an arm around him conspiratorially, "How's Liam?"

"Good," Zayn says, looking out into the yard where Safaa is on Liam's shoulder and beaming. He thinks again that he knows exactly what to say to Liam, exactly what to do.

"You're having a pretty good school year, aren't you?" she says.

"Yeah," Zayn says.

"I'm glad," she says, then she grins again and says, "So was that a genuine offer of help?"

"Sure."

"Go ask people if they're ready for cake?" she asks. Zayn smiles and lets himself be hugged one more time before heading outside. The vote for cake is unanimously yes, and they all give a thumbs up through the door and towards the kitchen before Zayn slides up to Liam.

"Hey," he says.

"Hi," Liam says, eyes darting around and looking a little nervous.

"You don't have anything to do on Wednesday, do you?" Zayn asks. Liam frowns a little as they fall back, letting the rest of the yard run towards the house and cake ahead of them.

"Wednesday?" Liam asks.

"Inservice, no school, remember?" Zayn says.

"Right. Um, no?" Liam says.

"Drive me into the city?" Zayn asks.

"Okay?" Liam says, still sounding confused. Zayn grins at him,

"Do you remember this summer when you asked me if you could come with me next time I got a tattoo?" Zayn asks.

"Of course," Liam says.

"I was thinking Wednesday," Zayn says.

"Oh," Liam says, "oh! Really?"

"Yeah, I mean, if you still wanted to come?" Zayn asks.

"I do."

"Good," Zayn says.

"What um, what are you getting?" Liam asks.

"Something I've wanted to do for like, a year," Zayn says, "but you helped."

"I helped?"

"With the placement," Zayn says, and then he lifts a hand to touch under his collarbone, the same spot Liam had been touching right before their first kiss. Liam beams at him, just outright beams, and Zayn grins back, glad this is working out exactly like he'd wanted it to.

"You're missing cake!" Niall calls.

"Niall might eat it all before you get a chance if you walk any slower," Harry says.

"Race me?" Liam says.

"We're like, three feet away. And you're a track star," Zayn says.

"Race me anyway?" Liam says. Zayn grins and they run the last several steps, just for fun.

 

***

"How many do you want like, altogether?" Liam asks in the car on Wednesday. November weather has come back harsh and frigid and Zayn is glad for his sweater and the warm mug holding the coffee Liam had made him.

"Don't know?" Zayn shrugs.

"No plan?" Liam says.

"Not right now," Zayn says. Liam grins and takes a sip of his own coffee as they sit at a red light.

"Thank you for bringing me," he says.

"You asked," Zayn says, "and I thought after, Gemma said there is this place with milkshakes a few blocks from campus? Which means it's only a few blocks from the shop, and I mean, I know it's cold, but I thought we could stop?" Zayn asks.

"I don't think it can ever be too cold for milkshakes," Liam says. Zayn grins.

They pull into the little parking lot behind the shop, shivering and sipping the ends of their coffee as they walk across the parking lot.

"And they let you do this here, you being underage?" Liam asks, sounding a little nervous.

"Nope, we're about to be arrested," Zayn says, smirking.

"Zayn!" Liam says.

"It's fine, I told you, this place belongs to my cousin's friend, and Doniya's boyfriend actually works here now too," Zayn says.

"I've never met her," Liam says as they walk in, still looking a little nervous, which is really unfairly adorable.

"Maybe next time we're in the city," Zayn says. He reaches in his pocket and pulls out the inscription he wants as they walk over to the counter. Liam studies it over his shoulder, eyes brimming with questions he must be waiting until later to ask. Liam sits in the room with him while he gets the tattoo, watching, looking a little wide eyed and also a little bit of something Zayn recognizes as turned on. He grins at him, doing his best not to flinch at all and hold eye contact with Liam the whole time, just because he can. After it's all done and paid for, pictures taken with Liam's phone to send to Louis, Harry and Niall, Zayn suggests they walk over to get their milkshakes, in spite of the cold.

He wants to get as much of a feel for the neighborhood as possible, practicing the steps he hopes to be taking next year. He has to reassure Liam a few times that his car will be fine. Liam agrees and they head out.

"Does it hurt?" Liam asks as they walk.

"Yes," Zayn admits.

"Worth it?" Liam asks.

"Absolutely," Zayn says grinning.

"Do you, you had that planned for awhile?" Liam asks.

"I did," Zayn says, "for about a year now."

"How much, can you just like, phrases or do you speak or like?" Liam asks, biting his lip and tripping over his words a little like he doesn't want to say the wrong thing. Zayn grins.

"When we were kids, my dad would always tell us stories, or sometimes just switch to talking to us, in Urdu, just so we had it in our lives. And when we'd write letters to my grandparents or talk to them on the phone it was always in Urdu. When we visited, too, and now we do video chats and it's the same," Zayn says.

"I didn't know that," Liam says.

"You do now. Fact of the day?" Zayn says. Liam grins. He looks full of thoughts still, like ideas are forming in his head.

"Fact of the day," Liam says, "it's freezing."

"We're almost there," Zayn says.

"And these milkshakes are good?" Liam asks.

"She said they were life-changing," Zayn says. He pulls a cigarette out of his pocket, needing it post-tattoo, and smokes it the rest of the way there, Liam still looking thoughtful beside him. They reach the ice cream parlor and find it crowed. They wait in line for several minutes, but the second Zayn takes a sip of his milkshake, he grins.

"Also worth it," Liam says.

"Yeah," Zayn says. They pull out chairs and sit at a small table, sipping their milkshakes and smiling at each other.

"You like it here, don't you? This part of town, you're picturing yourself like, studying with one of these next year, aren't you?" Liam says.

"I might be," Zayn says. Liam smiles again, so warm and like he's _proud_ or something.

"This is your first choice now, the Art Institute, I mean?" Liam asks.

"Yeah, I sent off my full application packet and portfolio yesterday," Zayn says.

"Good," Liam says, and he's still grinning and before Zayn can stop it he hears himself asking,

"What about you?"

"I sent three applications out this week, actually, I was waiting to see where we ranked in nationals before I did finalized anything," Liam says.

"No, I meant, applications to where?" Zayn asks. He hears something desperate in his own question and he hates himself for it so he presses on, "I mean, it's weird that we've never talked about that? And I was just wondering, you know, where you'll be in the fall?"

"You were?" Liam says, beaming at him like heard everything in that that Zayn was sort of hoping he didn't. Not that Liam seems freaked out, or anything, but Zayn just. People go to college, they leave, and he's okay with that, even if those people are Liam. He is.

"You've just never told me," Zayn says.

"You never asked," Liam says, "but I'm not going far."

"You're not?"

"I'm applying four places, three right here in the city, one in the next county," Liam says, and fuck everything if can't actually feel his heart expanding at that. He's such an idiot, but he thinks that might be the best thing he's ever heard.

"Really?" Zayn asks, "You don't want to go far?"

"Not really, there are some amazing schools right here, and it's just far enough from home to be away, you know?" Liam asks.

"I know," Zayn says. Liam kicks his foot against Zayn's under the table.

"You were wondering?" Liam asks.

"I felt like it was a thing I should know," Zayn says. Liam rolls his eyes fondly.

"I'm glad you'll be here, too," Liam says.

"I might not get in," Zayn says. Liam shakes his head, and Zayn's heart seriously still feels gigantic in his chest and bites back saying how terrified he was that Liam was leaving, bites back admitting just how much he cares where Liam will be in August.

"You will," Liam says confidently, taking a final sip of his milkshake, still beaming. Zayn smiles back and says,

"So, which schools specifically, then?" And when Liam answers, he totally doesn't mentally try and figure out how far each of those campuses is from the Art Institute is.

***

That night there is a tap on his window slightly after one and Zayn stands up to let Liam in, grinning.

"Miss me already?" he says, shutting the window behind Liam.

"You're not wearing a shirt," Liam observes. Zayn grins.

"I didn't want it rubbing against the new tattoo," Zayn says. Liam tugs on his hand and pulls him back to his bed, looking a little nervous.

"Right," Liam says. They crawl into the bed, Liam crawling on top of Zayn and running his fingers over the gauze covering Zayn's fresh tattoo.

"In a hurry?" Zayn asks, teasing. Liam shakes his head and bites his lip.

"I was wondering if I could do something," Liam asks.

"Do something?"

"I mean, if it was okay with you, I was sort of thinking earlier, I kind of wanted," Liam leans forward to a space low on Zayn's neck, right above his collarbone on the other side from his new tattoo and licks a small spot, tracing circles with his tongue and then sucking on the spot until Zayn is biting back a moan.

"Fuck," Zayn breathes.

"I sort of wanted, if you wanted, to um," Liam stops and bites his lip again, "I thought, if there were marks on your skin, um, from me?" Zayn sucks in a breath and nods his head rapidly.

"We could. Yes," he says. He's not sure how Liam manages to come out with things like that, how Liam manages to say things that make his heart explode one second and then make his brain melt away the next, but he's pretty sure he never, ever wants Liam to stop doing it. Liam smiles at him, a little nervous still, but returns to the spot he'd been working on earlier. He makes several by the time he's done, making them until Zayn has to pull a pillow over his face to cover up groans that would wake the whole house if he let them out.

"Do you?" Liam says, pulling back from the spot he'd made so low on Zayn's hips that Zayn had thought he might die during it.

"Please," Zayn bites out. Liam smirks and complies, pulling Zayn's pants off and grabbing onto his hips.

Zayn closes his eyes and shoves the pillow down over his face again, pretty sure he's never been more grateful for the window in his room.

 

***

Zayn's putting books in his locker before lunch when Eleanor approaches him, glancing around like she's checking for something.

"Hi," she says.

"Hey," he says. It's still a little weird, talking to people, having conversations with people at this school who aren't Louis or Niall or even Liam or Harry. He still has to remind himself that this is a thing now, that he can be social with people. Really.

"So, a bunch of people were talking, and you know how the drum major usually gets something at the end of the year banquet?" Eleanor asks.

"Yeah," Zayn says.

"Well we were thinking that since it was such an amazing season, and since his birthday is soon, we could all collect for Louis now? I was talking to people, and we thought at least from the upperclassmen, if not from everyone right now?" she says.

"That makes sense," Zayn says.

"I thought so. Aiden said he'd collect from the juniors, and I'll get all the seniors, and then if it's alright, I was thinking we'd give it to you and you guys could pick something to be from all of us?"

"Yeah, of course," Zayn says, shutting his locker and zipping up his bag.

"Okay, so we'll try to get it to you in the next two weeks, and I'll pass around a card too," she says.

"Sounds good," Zayn says. She smiles.

"Good," she says, "I've gotta run to calc, but I wanted to catch you when you weren't with Louis."

"Have fun," he says. She makes a face and waves, heading off down the hall and he shoves his hands in his pockets and heads into the cafeteria. Louis, Niall, Harry and Liam are all already at the table by the time he arrives and slides in next to Liam.

"So, um," Harry starts, blushing a little and looking around at them all as Zayn unwraps his sandwich.

"Yes?" Niall says.

"I was thinking that if you guys wanted, it might be fun to do, like, a holiday exchange thing? Each of us gets one of the others and we could exchange at Lou's birthday?" Harry says.

"Like a secret Santa?" Niall says at the moment Louis says,

"Yes, absolutely," and looks at Harry in that way he does sometimes, that sort of hopelessly endeared way that makes Zayn really happy for them.

"I just thought it would be fun?" Harry says.

"Why not?" Niall says, "there are five of us."

"I like it too," Liam says.

"You probably already have all our names on little slips of paper, don't you?" Zayn asks, smirking a little.

"It doesn't hurt to be prepared," Harry says, grinning at him.

"There's no need to mock his holiday spirit," Louis says.

"I wasn't mocking," Zayn says.

"You were a little," Harry says. Zayn grins.

"With affection, I promise," he says. Harry smiles back and then reaches into his bag and pulls out five little folded slips of paper.

"You're in though, right?" he asks.

"I'm in," Zayn says.

"So, um, if you pick yourself, put it back?" Harry says, and then he holds out his hand to Louis, who takes one and grins.

"What if I get someone I don't like?" Louis says, smirking. Harry shoves at his shoulder, dropping the four folded slips of paper as he does. Louis reaches down to pick them up for him, still smirking.

"But I can't mock?" Zayn asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Be quiet and pick someone," Louis says, depositing the papers back in Harry's hand. Harry holds them out to Zayn, who reaches out and grabs one and grins when he reads _Harry_ on his slip. Niall picks next, and then Liam, leaving Harry with the last one.

"No one has themselves? Or I guess, actually, Liam and Zayn probably shouldn't have each other? Or me and Louis?" Harry says.

"I'm good," Liam says, glancing around. Everyone else nods.

"Sometimes I feel really outnumbered around here, you know," Niall says.

"You wouldn't want it any other way and you know it," Louis says.

"Yeah, well," Niall says.

"Now that we've settled that, I think we should talk about what else you're all going to do to make my birthday memorable," Louis says, slinging an arm around Harry as he does.

****  
Harry slides up to him in study hall the next Monday, collapsing down in the chair next to Zayn and sighing dramatically.

"Alright there, H?" Zayn says, trying not to grin. 

"Help me," Harry says. 

"How?" Zayn asks. Harry looks at Zayn, eyes round and hair even bigger than normal. 

"This weekend Louis and I went into the city, right? He actually went to a college interview and on a tour and then we walked around the cultural district," Harry says.

"Okay?" Zayn asks. 

"And like, we walked past this sign for a show? This like, one night only in January thing for um, those guys from Rent? That Adam Pascal guy Louis loves and the other one? A blond guy? I don't remember his name, but Lou actually stopped walking and just stared at the poster for a while," Harry says. 

"Anthony Rapp?" Zayn suggests, because he's been friends with Louis for far too long not to know these things.

"Yes!" Harry says. 

"And?"

"Oh, right. But tickets are really expensive," Harry says. Zayn blinks at him. 

"I'm still lost," Zayn says. 

"For Christmas! It would be perfect! He would freak out and the two of us could have a night in the city and he could wear that jacket he always says he's saving for special occasions!" Harry says. 

"His celebrity-meeting jacket?" Zayn asks, grinning. Louis has this ridiculous jacket he'd found for dirt cheap at a yard sale in tenth grade. He'd looked it up online when he got home and it was a designer who must be a big deal because it's worth ten times what he paid for it, so he always says it's one of his most prized possessions. 

"Exactly!" Harry says. 

"But you can't afford it?" Zayn asks. 

"Not at all," Harry says. 

"You'll think of something else," Zayn says. 

"But I don't want to! It's perfect," Harry says. 

"I know, but you can't like, sell an organ or anything," Zayn says. Harry sighs again.

"But he'd love it, right? I mean, you think it's perfect too?" Harry asks. 

"He would," Zayn agrees. Harry bites his lip. 

"I don't have time to pick up more hours at the bakery," Harry says. 

"Maybe look and see if you can find them cheap online?" Zayn suggests.

"I tried that!" Harry says, burying his head in his arms on the table in front of them. 

"I don’t know what to tell you," Zayn says. 

"But they're perfect and now that I've thought of them I can't think of a single other thing," Harry says. 

"You will," Zayn says. 

"I won't," Harry says miserably. 

"You will," Zayn repeats. Harry sighs again, but at least he picks his head back up.

"What are you getting Liam?" he asks. 

"I don't know yet, actually? I have a couple ideas, but I haven't bought anything yet," Zayn says. He actually doesn’t have as many ideas as he probably should. He keeps dismissing everything he thinks of as cliché. He sort of wants it to be big, though, memorable, even if he still beats himself up for thoughts like that. Things have been really good lately, though, Liam's been sneaking into his room like, twice a week, they've been seeing a ridiculous amount of each other, really. It's weird how Zayn doesn't mind that, doesn't miss his space as much as he would have thought. Liam has been all questions still, but Zayn doesn't mind that, either. It's actually really flattering how much Liam cares. Ever since the day they'd gone for Zayn's tattoo, Zayn can actually feel how much of an effort Liam is making, asking him stories about his childhood and traditions at his house and then switching the conversation to hopeful talk about next year in the next breath, like he's worried he's being intrusive. Zayn is pretty sure that all deserves something pretty amazing, gift-wise. He's just not sure what yet. Harry nods.

"I'll figure it out," Harry says, suddenly more resolved than he'd been a minute ago.

"Something else?" Zayn asks. 

"How to get the tickets," Harry corrects. He runs a hand through his hair, looking stressed but determined.

"Sorry I wasn't helpful?" Zayn offers. Harry shakes his head. 

"I mostly just wanted someone to listen," Harry says. 

"In that case, you're welcome?" 

"Thanks," Harry says, grinning. He glances over at Zayn at then, studying the spot on his arm where his sleeve is only mostly covering a tattoo, "one more question?"

"Sure," Zayn says. 

"Your tattoo hookup, would I be able to, I mean, could you vouch for me or something? Because I've been thinking that I really want to do something. Multiple somethings," Harry says. 

"Yeah, absolutely," Zayn says, biting back a huge grin because Harry has just unknowingly handed him exactly what the perfect present for him would be. He makes a mental note to text after school and see about getting Harry a gift certificate, one paid for at his family-discounted rate but enough to get Harry whatever he wants. 

"That would be awesome, thanks," Harry says. 

"Absolutely," Zayn says, "What are you thinking?" he asks. Harry starts off, big-eyed and talking a mile a minute about all the things he wants, making the rest of study hall fly past, consumed by tattoo talk.

 

***

Zayn is debating whether the _Toy Story_ deluxe box set thing he'd bought earlier is too easy and not as thoughtful as it should be even if he does include something else with it when his window flings open and Louis hops in, throwing his coat off and flopping on Zayn's bed without saying a word.

"Hello to you, too," Zayn says.

"What the hell am I supposed to get your boyfriend?" Louis says, staring at Zayn's ceiling. 

"Doesn’t telling me who you have violate the rules of this thing?" Zayn asks, sitting down next to him on the bed.

"Oh, whatever," Louis says. 

"If it helps, I know exactly what I'm getting your boyfriend," Zayn says, smirking. 

"That's the opposite of helpful, actually," Louis says. 

"I know," Zayn says, laying down too, his leg brushing Louis', "I also know what your boyfriend is trying to get you."

"Why do I come here?" Louis asks. 

"I don't know, it's not like I invite you," Zayn says. 

"I don't suppose you're going to tell me either of those things, are you?" Louis asks. 

"Not a chance," Zayn says. Louis rolls over on his elbow and looks at Zayn.

"I'm also pretty fucked as to what to get Harry," Louis says. 

"You're good at presents," Zayn says, frowning a little and rolling over too.

"I know I am. However, the perfect present for Harry is sadly not within my budget," Louis says. 

"No?" Zayn asks, swallowing a laugh. There is something perfectly fitting, he thinks, about Harry and Louis wanting to do things for each other that they can't actually afford at all. Louis pulls out his phone and touches the screen a few times and then presents the screen to Zayn. 

"See?" he says. 

"It's a record player," Zayn says. 

"Obviously. He's got this massive record collection but no record player, and this like, matches his room and everything," Louis says. 

"Can't you just go for like, a less expensive version? Can't you get these things pretty cheap at Target or wherever?" Zayn asks. Louis narrows his eyes. 

'This one _matches his room_ ," Louis says. 

"You said," Zayn says. 

"I can't get him some cheap version when the perfect one exists," Louis says. 

"Sure you can, because we're teenagers," Zayn says. Louis scoffs and pulls his phone back, shoving it in his pocket.

"But it will make him love me forever," Louis says. 

"A record player will make him love you forever?"

"Yes!"

"Louis," Zayn says, rolling his eyes. 

"Well, it could! Every time he looks at it he'll think, 'Louis bought that because he is the most wonderful person in the world' or something along those lines," Louis says. 

"But if he looked at one you could actually afford he'd think 'well fuck that guy?'" Zayn questions. 

"Exactly!" Louis says. 

"You know that's not true," Zayn says. 

"It might be!" Louis says. 

"Not at all," Zayn says. Louis sighs. 

"It's important, though!" Louis says. 

"I get it, I do, but you can't like, rob a store for him," Zayn says, mostly because he's already used 'sell an organ' as hyperbole in his conversation with Harry. 

"You're not being helpful," Louis says. 

"Because you don't want actual advice," Zayn says. 

"Still not helpful," Louis says. Zayn rolls his eyes. 

"Liam is the easiest person to shop for ever, by the way. I still haven't gotten it figured out because I want to do something like, meaningful, but you really shouldn't have trouble," Zayn says. 

"A grand romantic gesture?" Louis asks, grinning. 

"Sure," Zayn says. 

"We could rob a store together," Louis suggests. 

"Nope," Zayn says. 

"So, what are you thinking?" Louis asks. 

"What?"

"For Liam. You didn't help me at all, but that's okay. I'll still help you," Louis says. 

"You're a saint, Lou," Zayn says. 

"I really am," Louis says, "So?"

"Well, I mean, I've sort of been thinking, I bought something that he'll love but that isn't, you know, the most thoughtful thing ever? But I was thinking I could pair it with something," Zayn asks. 

"Such as?" Louis asks.

"Do you think it's, I mean, do you think it's horridly cliché and stupid and he'd hate if I, um, drew him something? Like, of us?" Zayn asks, voicing an idea that's been forming in his head for days now. He actually has it all sketched out in his mind, them as superheroes, big and full of color and maybe like, framed. 

"I think you're an idiot if you don't do that, actually," Louis says. 

"Yeah?" Zayn asks, "because I um, sort of thought like, us as superheroes?"

"That might be the sweetest thing I've ever heard you say," Louis says. 

"You think?" Zayn asks. Louis grins at him.

"I always knew you were a secret romantic," he says. 

"That might be an exaggeration," Zayn says. 

"I don't think so," Louis says. 

"Whatever," Zayn says, flushing a little. Louis tangles their legs together and leans in.

"So, since I helped you," he says. 

"Still not robbing a store," Zayn says. 

"Be helpful!" Louis says. 

"I tried!" Zayn says. 

"But it's important," Louis says, "like, I can't just, it's our first Christmas and I love him, you know?"

"I know," Zayn says. He really does get it, he does. Sometimes the intensity of Harry and Louis' relationship seems like so much to him, like, he's not sure how they get through the day having that many feelings about each other, but that doesn't mean he doesn’t still think it's a really, really good thing for Louis. For both of them. That he's not still really happy for them. 

***

Louis gets a letter in the mail a few days later, a letter in a large, thick envelope he brings with him to lunch, and throws it down on the table, just staring at all of them.

"What is that?" Niall asks. 

"It's December," Liam says. 

"Rolling admissions," Harry says, squeezing Louis' hand under the table, in a way that isn't nearly as hidden as he probably thinks it is. Not that it much matters, Zayn doesn't think there is really anyone left who isn't on to Harry and Louis. 

"Oh," Liam says. 

"Do you need me to do it?" Harry asks. 

"Yes," Louis says. Harry releases Louis' hand and reaches forward, tearing the envelope as Louis resolutely looks away, "I don't even know what I want it to say," Louis says. 

"Congratulations," Harry says. Louis sort of freezes at that. 

"Yeah?" He asks. 

"You don't, this just means this is an option now, not a decision," Harry says, and Zayn thinks that's sort of the perfect thing to say here. He shoots Harry an impressed smile. 

"Right," Louis says, taking the sheet from Harry and glancing over it, eyes getting wide at parts. 

"Options are good," Liam puts in, clearly trying to help. 

"It's real," Louis says. 

"That's a good thing," Harry says gently. Louis nods, looking a little dazed. 

"Congratulations," Zayn says.

"Yeah, well done!" Niall says. 

"Congratulations," Liam says. 

"Thanks," Louis says. He's not very focused for the rest of lunch, but he's not having a meltdown either, and Zayn thinks that's probably a very good sign. Eleanor catches him again after lunch and tells him she's sorry it's getting so close, but that she should have all the money to him by Friday. Zayn had honestly sort of forgotten that was happening, and nods and tries to work out what to get Louis that can be from everyone. He really does deserve it. 

 

***

Zayn is shading Liam's cape when there is a knock at his window, and he hurriedly sticks it in his top dresser drawer before letting Liam in, grinning at him.

"Hey you," he says, kissing Liam softly. 

"Hi," Liam says, biting his lip a little. 

"It's not the middle of the night," Zayn says, teasing. 

"No one's home at my house and I wanted to talk to you. So I just came," Liam says, taking off his coat and laying it on the back of Zayn's chair. His cheeks are red from the cold and he looks a little bit fidgety. 

"What's up?" Zayn asks, sitting down on his bed and motioning for Liam to follow. He wills himself not be nervous and imagine scenarios where Liam has decided he's actually going to college in Europe or something. Liam sits down and takes a deep breath, which doesn't do much for Zayn's nerves. 

"I um, I was talking to Louis and Niall in English the other day because had a sub so it was mostly a study hall," Liam says. 

"Okay."

"And they were talking about how you and Louis met Niall and we were talking about last summer when the five of us starting hanging out," Liam says.

"Right," Zayn says. 

"And I asked, um, how you and Louis had met? And Louis said I had to ask you that," Liam says, looking at him. 

"Oh," Zayn says, and it's one of those moments when he thinks Louis is the actual best friend anyone could ever have. 

"And I thought if I was asking you that, I mean, if you wanted, would you just, tell me about you and Louis, like, start from where you meant, but. I want to know everything," Liam says. 

"You do?" Zayn asks. Liam nods. 

"You guys are just, it's so important to you, he is. And I, sometimes I-" Liam stops and shakes his head. 

"Sometimes you what?" Zayn asks. 

"Sometimes I just, I can never be Louis, I can't compete with that much history, and I know, I know that it's not like that and I know that's ridiculous, but. I can't help but feel like it is a competition, sometimes," Liam says. 

"I don't want you to be Louis," Zayn says. 

"I know, but I. You have to understand that it's a lot, right?" Liam asks, chewing on his bottom lip. 

"I do," Zayn says. 

"Okay. So, you don't have to, of course, but I really would like, I really think I sort of need to hear everything," Liam says. Zayn nods. 

"I wasn't trying to keep anything from you, Li," Zayn says. 

"I know," Liam says. Zayn grabs fro Liam's hand, lacing their fingers together before he starts. 

"When we moved here in third grade, that was a really shitty year, and I don't know if you've ever been over there, but me and Lou went to West? Which has to be the most depressing elementary school on earth. Our slide shook on windy days and the doors were the world's ugliest shade of orange," Zayn says. 

"I went to North," Liam says, squeezing Zayn's hand like he's bracing himself. 

"Right. Well, be glad. The only good thing we had was that Louis' mom used to be school nurse at West," Zayn says. 

"I didn't know that."

"Yeah, she was our nurse, and she used to let me hide in her office," Zayn says. 

"Hide?" Liam asks. 

"Hide. There was this kid, this fifth grader, and he made no secret of his problem with me," Zayn says, "so I used to just, I mean, the first time he actually like, shoved me against a locker and I was a little banged up. But after he usually stuck to saying shit and I mostly just hid out and she let me, and Louis would come down to visit her, you know? And like, he'd sit with me and we'd eat all the lollipops and we'd plot revenge against that guy and his stupid friends. We never did it, but it helped," Zayn says. 

"I'm sorry," Liam says. He has that worried look on his face again, and he doesn't press for details, but Zayn thinks the ones he's filling in on his own are probably pretty accurate. 

"Yeah, so I mean, Louis and I just stuck after that. It was just like, it was always us and I didn't really bother getting to know people who weren't him until Niall, and then you and Harry, obviously. But like," he stops and glances at Liam, "you're sure?"

"Yes," Liam nods.

"Okay, so in ninth grade Louis was in danger of having to repeat and I was helping him study, so we were spending even more time together than normal, right? And then on top of that I was like, I'd dated a few girls but none of it had lasted, and I was thinking a lot about what I was into and who and why and all that stuff, and like, it would be late at night and we'd be there and I told Louis because that's just, because we do that, you know? And he had already like, at summer camp, made out with some guy? And he was telling me about it and how it was different from girls, and like, in the middle of telling me. We. Stopped talking about it," Zayn says, watching Liam to gauge his reaction. 

"Okay," Liam says, nodding and looking like he might be reminding himself to breathe. 

"So we just, we kept at it. For a while, and we. I mean hormones and stuff, so we just, went with whatever happened," Zayn says. 

"How long is a while?" Liam asks. 

"All of that spring and summer? Probably until the beginning of sophomore year," Zayn says. Liam winces a little at that but nods again.

"How, I mean, 'hormones and stuff'?" He echoes, raising an eyebrow. 

"I, it was just making out, and then, when he didn't fail ninth grade, I um, congratulated him. And that lasted all summer," Zayn confesses. Liam closes his eyes at that, he's a little red, but he hasn't left yet, or anything.

"And then it just stopped?" Liam asks. 

"It was just sort of, done?" Zayn shrugs.

"I don't, that's the part I don't understand?" Liam says, opening his eyes and looking at Zayn. 

"We just, I don't know, Louis wanted to date this guy he met at some party and I thought it might be nice to actually date too, and we couldn't do that if we were still. Doing that," Zayn says. Liam bites his lip. 

"But like, he just went right back to sleeping in your bed and that was that? The end?" Liam asks. 

"There were, I mean a couple times during sophomore year we backslid into it a little. But never for more than a night at a time," Zayn says. 

"And not since then?" Liam asks. 

"Not since then," Zayn confirms. Liam nods. 

"Okay," he says, "thank you."

"Yeah? Are we okay?" Zayn asks. Liam nods again and then leans in and kisses Zayn, pressing their foreheads together when he pulls back. He looks thoughtful for a moment, then he says,

"I know it's not, like, the same? But you know how I was sick a lot as a kid? I was like, I mean, always picked last in gym, and I got, I mean, some scrapes on my knees that I told my mom were because I fell, but I didn't. You know, fall on my own? I know it's not the same, and I'm never, I would never, I just, being a kid sucked. I wish I had known you then. Maybe we could have taken down the bullies together," Liam says. Zayn sucks in a breath, pretty sure his heart like, melts at that. 

"My track star, cross-country champion, picked last in gym?" he says, because doesn't have the words to comment on the rest of what Liam had said, because those words are stuck in his throat, too big for high school, too big for being seventeen, but too small for Liam, to small for this moment. Liam beams at him.

"Yours?" he echoes, "Really?"

"I mean, unless I'm wrong about what we're doing here, I sort of thought that was the idea," Zayn says. 

"I know, you've just, you've never said, that," Liam says. 

"I've thought it," Zayn says. Liam kisses him again. 

"Good," he says. 

"And thank you," Zayn says, "I- I would have tried to take down playground bullies with you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. We could have taken them," Zayn says. Liam grins again and they snuggle back into Zayn's bed properly. 

That night, Zayn adds a comic-style text panel to the bottom of his drawing, explaining that their superhero team would be taking down a gang who called themselves the Playground Bullies. It's a little cheesy, but he thinks it's sort of perfect. 

 

***

Zayn is at the mall buying a frame for Liam's picture and trying to gather some ideas for the band gift to Louis when Niall runs out of the video game store he works at and up to him.

"So, I just got a text from Ed," Niall says. 

"Aren't you supposed to be working?" Zayn says. Niall glares at him. 

"He's at work and he wants to know if we know why Harry just sold a large portion of his record collection," Niall says. Zayn's eyes go a little wide at that. 

"Oh my god," he says. 

"What? Do you know something?" Niall asks. 

"I might," Zayn says, shaking his head. He pulls out his phone, trying to decide who to text or what to do, when Danielle waves at them from behind the counter of the clothing resale shop she must work at. She flags them down, looking a little worried. Zayn shakes his head, trying to tell himself that they didn't, they wouldn't, even though he's pretty sure they _did_.

"Hey guys," Danielle says. 

"Hi!" Niall says. 

"Louis was just here, and he sold this jacket? He seemed really upset about it, he was like, petting it? But then he told me it was for a good cause?" Danielle says, shooting them both a questioning look. 

"They did, they actually did," Zayn says. 

"What?" Niall asks. 

"They're so, they're living out classic stories now," Zayn says. 

"I'm lost," Danielle says. Zayn looks at both of them and then figures that he's going to need help sorting this out so they should probably know. 

"Gift of the Magi?" Zayn says. "Louis' jacket, Harry's records. Tickets for Lou, a record player for Haz," Zayn says. 

"No," Niall says, eyes disbelieving. 

"I don't know how to process how adorable that is," Danielle says. 

"Fucking idiots," Niall says fondly. Zayn shakes his head. 

"Okay, can you text Ed and tell him to hide those records?" he asks Niall. 

"On it," Niall says. 

"Do you think everyone would mind if the money from the collection for Louis went towards getting them their stuff back?" Zayn asks Danielle. 

"I think that's perfect," she says. 

"I don't know if that will totally cover it," Zayn says, glancing at the price sticker that's now looped through Louis' jacket. 

"I have a little to spend still," Niall says. 

"Me too, and I'll text Li," Zayn says. 

"He has Louis for your gift exchange thing and hasn't gotten him anything yet anyway," Danielle puts in. They both stare at her. 

"Right," Zayn says. 

"He said if he told me it wasn't breaking the rules," Danielle says, shrugging, then she grins at Zayn, "and he's been all preoccupied trying to figure out something for you."

"Oh," Zayn says, flushing a little. 

"If it helps, you can use my discount on getting the jacket back," Danielle says. 

"Breaking rules for a good cause?" Niall asks, as Zayn texts Liam and fills him in.

"The magic of the season and the power of love. Or something like that, I think," Danielle says, grinning. 

"Thanks," Zayn says, looking up from his phone and smiling. 

"Of course," Danielle says. 

"Ed hid them all, he texted me the total together," Niall reports, when his phone buzzes again. They head off so Zayn can throw the frame he'd bought in Niall's trunk before Liam arrives. Niall tells his boss he's having a family emergency, which Zayn raises his eyebrow at until he realizes it's sort of true. He's pretty sure this does, actually, count as a family emergency. Liam meets them in the food court and they pool their money together. With Danielle's discount, they can pull this off with five dollars to spare. Liam shakes his head in disbelief the whole time. 

"Only them," Liam says. 

"So, we're not telling them we did this, are we?" Niall asks. 

"What fun is that?" Zayn asks. 

"How are you thinking we do this?" Liam asks. 

"I think Lou said they're exchanging with each other the night before his party, so we'll let them. And then at his party, we'll give their stuff back," Zayn says. 

"That's good," Niall says. 

"That way they can have their big sweeping gesture still," Liam says.

"Exactly," Zayn says. 

"But Louis can't go to that show without his jacket," Niall says. 

"And what use would Harry have for his record player?" Liam asks, grinning. 

"Fucking idiots," Niall says again, even fonder than before, if possible. 

"It really is sweet, though," Liam says. 

"It is," Zayn agrees. 

"Yeah," Niall says, nodding. 

"Romantic," Liam says, smiling. 

"Very," Niall says, and then they all sort of burst into laughter, shaking their heads. They buy back the jacket first and then head out to get Harry's records. They spend their remaining five dollars and the change in Niall's car on a pizza that isn't very good, and that they sit in the car to eat, shivering at the rattling of Niall's heater and swapping their favorite Harry and Louis stories. 

***

The day before Louis' party, they day he and Liam are planning to exchange gifts, Zayn gets home from his three-hours-twice-a-week job to find Liam already at his house. Sitting in his kitchen. Coloring pictures of horses with Safaa. Zayn blinks. 

"Hi," he says, hanging his coat in the closet and staring. 

"Hey!" Liam says brightly. 

"Um. What?" Zayn asks. 

"I'm babysitting," Liam says, as if that makes anything approaching sense at all. 

"You're. What?" Zayn asks, thrown. 

"Well, I had, Safaa was helping me with something, and somewhere along the line I ended up offering to babysit now sometimes?" Liam says. Safaa nods and beams at Zayn, looking pleased with herself and also like she might be biting the inside of her cheek, like she's trying to keep a secret. 

"When did this happen?" Zayn asks, trying to process. 

"Last week," Liam says. 

"Where was I?" Zayn asks. 

"Well the thing is, it was sort of a surprise. So you weren't here," Liam says. Zayn just sits down, trying to take in what's happening here. A car horn beeps outside, and Zayn vaguely registers that today is gymnastics day, that Safaa is usually gone before he gets home from work and that she normally waits at a neighbor's house for that very reason. She bounces a little as she hugs him, and then she hugs Liam, grabbing her back and running out the door looking like she might burst from a secret. Zayn stares. 

"What?" Zayn says when she's gone and they're alone. 

"Hi?" Liam says, flushing a little. 

"I'm so lost here," Zayn says. Liam leans forward and kisses him.

"I know," Liam says. 

"Help?" Zayn says, frowning a little. Liam's eyes go big and his voice goes fast as he says, 

"I didn't, I mean, I didn't like, say anything, to your family, I mean, they know we're all friends and I didn't, I don't know how that, but I wanted, I just wanted some help with something," Liam says. Zayn nods. 

"I didn't think you did," Zayn said. Not that. He is pretty sure that everyone knows, that everyone suspects, and he's all but told Doniya a few times, but he's never actually said anything. So. 

"Okay, because I just, can we go to your room?" Liam asks. 

"You're lucky I wrapped your presents last night," Zayn says. Liam makes another face.

"Oh! I didn't even think of that," Liam says. Zayn grins at him and they head down the hall to his room, Zayn still trying to process the whole Liam babysitting thing. 

"So, explain?" Zayn says once they're in his room. Liam blushes again. 

"I um, I wanted to, well, when we had that party at Lou's for band season? I was talking to the girls then, and I asked them if they would help me with something, and then I like, I had to ask your mom, you know, so I'm not some creepy guy hanging around kids or whatever, and they were helping with- this is sort of a present but not, I mean, it is but-" Liam stops and reaches into his duffle bag, which is sitting on the foot of Zayn's bed, and pulls out a flat package and hands it Zayn. 

Zayn raises an eyebrow but then opens it, a little confused when he sees what is clearly a hand-designed calendar, but then he flips through it and he gets it, mouth hanging open a little,

"I hope, I mean, I know it's a little, optimistic? But I wanted to include everything, like, all the holidays and the events and I had help, I had your sisters walk me through things I wasn't super familiar with and then I'm sure you can see they drew the pictures for me, for the appropriate occasions, which is how I ended up getting asked to babysit, sometime during the drawings, and I just thought. I mean, not that we have to like, celebrate everything together for the rest of our lives or that I have to be there for anything you don’t want me there for and I would never like, insert myself if that's like, if I'm not welcomed or whatever but," Liam says.

"Liam," Zayn says, low with his heart beating faster than it ever has in his life. 

"And I mean, I wrote some things in, that's erasable, like our college start dates and stuff just if, I mean if we don't both get our first choice, but that's, the start dates and fall breaks and stuff for both of us, which I mean, you can erase if, you know. Or, I guess, if you had to, just mine, but I sort of figured if that was ever the case you wouldn't want the calendar at all, so like, I mean, I wrote our anniversary in there? We never said it was like, official but I just thought, and so, I mean, I hope," Liam says, and he's just talking and talking and Zayn puts the calendar on the bed and puts a hand over Liam's mouth.

"Just, give me a second to process," Zayn says, and his brain just turns and he can't, all he can think, all he can feel is just Liam.

"It's okay if you hate it," Liam says from behind his hand, and it's just so. Zayn is so overwhelmed and so fucking touched and so a million other things and just so full of feelings that he can't swallow down his big words, he can't bite them back and so when his mouth opens to say _thank you_ what he says instead is,

"I love you," and Liam sort of gasps and tugs Zayn's hand away so he can launch himself into Zayn's arms, clinging to him and whispering in his ear,

 

"I love you, too," and Zayn has to sit down, he is actually so overcome with all his feelings he has to sit. Which he didn’t even think was a real thing that happened to people, but apparently it is. He's sitting and he's fucking filled up with feelings and he's kissing Liam over and over again. He pulls back and wants to say something about how they're idiots and how they're so young, too young, and how they have no idea what college will bring and how it hasn't really been that long at all, but he doesn't. He doesn't say any of that, because he says, 

"I've been holding onto that for a while now," instead. 

"Me too," Liam says, looking happier than Zayn has ever seen him. 

"Thank you," Zayn says, after a minute, "That's sort of perfect, the calendar, I mean," and he thinks _and you too_ but he doesn't say it because he does still have some self control. 

"Yeah? I didn't, I was worried it would be too much, or that I was like, stepping into your life and intruding where you didn't want me, but I just, you're important and I want to be as much of part of things as you'll let me?" Liam says. 

"I want you," Zayn says, kissing Liam again. 

"I, good," Liam says, and then he reaches into his bag and pulls out another package which Zayn opens to find a really nice portfolio, the sort he's always wanted but never quite had enough money left over after supplies he actually needed to afford.

"This is perfect too," he says. 

"That one I knew you'd like," Liam says. Zayn grins and kisses Liam again before standing up and walking over to his closet.

"We think alike sometimes," Zayn says.

"You got me a portfolio?" Liam asks, grinning. Zayn smirks.

"You have a more practical, physical sort of thing, and then a more, sentimental, I guess, one?" Zayn says. 

"Really?" Liam asks beaming at him. Zayn nods and sits back down, handing Liam his packages. Liam opens the _Toy Story_ boxset first, and Zayn is rewarded with a little yelp of joy and about a dozen kisses for that, so he figures it was a good call after all. Liam slides the paper off his framed picture carefully, and then his eyes go the widest yet as he stares at it. 

" _Zayn_ ," he breathes out, sort of awed. 

"I just. I mean, I thought that was fitting, right?" Zayn asks. Liam looks up at him, eyes shining. 

"I, just, I love you a lot, really," Liam says. Zayn blushes. 

"Yeah?" he says. 

"It's, I mean, it's okay that I said it again, right?" Liam asks. Zayn rolls his eyes, just a little 

"I love you a lot too," he says. It's very, very possible that by next December the thought of this one will break his heart and make him feel like an idiot, but at this moment, he just can't bring himself to care. 

***

They'd decided a few days ago to let Louis and Harry tell their story at least twice before announcing it was time for gifts. It's going to be just the five of them for the first couple of hours, and then they'll be joined by several of the other seniors and handful of juniors to celebrate a little more properly. They'd run it past everyone that they were going to give Harry and Louis their stuff back, and thus Louis' present from the band early, and everyone had agreed that was probably for the best. Harry and Louis waste no time recounting the details of their gift for everyone over and over. 

"So I open it, and it's the most gorgeous thing, this record player is like, look!" Harry says, showing everyone a picture on his phone, "but I sold my records!"

"To buy me tickets! Not just any tickets, No, my Harry bought me the best tickets in the universe," Louis says, showing around a picture of himself holding the tickets and looking at them like they're million-dollar winning lottery tickets. "But, I have nothing to wear."

"Because he sold his jacket for me!" Harry says. 

"We are a love story for the ages," Louis says. They're clung even tighter to each other's side than normal, and they're looking at each other with what might be actual stars in their eyes, and every time the tell the story they tell it a little bit more dramatically until Liam says, 

"Okay! Gift exchange time?"

"Yes!" Niall agrees. They all sit on the couch and Louis looks like he's about to open his mouth to tell them what order they're doing this in, because he's Louis, when Zayn takes charge and says, 

"So, who has Liam?" Louis glares at him but hands a package to Liam who opens and then beams at Louis and thanks him over and over for the DVD set of classic superhero cartoons. 

"No hug?" Louis asks, and Liam rolls his eyes and throws himself across Niall and Harry to hug Louis properly.

"Thank you," Liam says. Louis grins. 

"Okay, who has Niall?" Zayn asks. 

"Me!" Harry says, tossing Niall a package that turns out to be a more than gift card for Niall's favorite restaurant, a deal where the chef will apparently, let Niall sit in the kitchen and make him anything he chooses.

"You are a wonderful person," Niall says. 

"I know a guy," Harry says, but he looks pleased with himself as he accepts Niall's giant hug. 

"Okay, and me?" Zayn says. Louis gives him a funny look, but Zayn ignores it. 

"That'd be me," Niall says, handing Zayn a package. It turns out to be a giant coffee-table-sized book of graphic novel art.

"That's awesome, thanks," Zayn says from inside the hug Niall has already pulled him into.

"You're welcome," Niall says. 

"Harry's turn," Zayn announces, pulling his gift for Harry out.

"Why am I last at my own birthday party?" Louis asks. 

"Because you're the guest of honor," Liam informs him. Louis makes a face, but relents and watches Harry open his gift certificate, face lighting up. 

"Oh, wow," Harry says, hugging Zayn so tightly he's practically on his lap. 

"You did give me the idea," Zayn says. 

"Yeah but, thank you," Harry says, beaming. 

"Yes, Zayn is very sweet," Louis says, smirking. 

"I guess it's Louis' turn now," Zayn says. 

"Only it's sort of still Harry's too," Niall says. 

"Did you get something for both of us, Liam?" Louis asks, looking a little delighted at the prospect. Everyone raises their eyebrows at him and he says, "What? I am capable of simple process of elimination logic here, you know."

"We know, but um, that's not quite it," Liam says.

"It sort of is," Niall says. 

"Liam had help, though," Zayn says, "the band upperclassmen took out a collection for you, Lou, they thought it was fitting if your drum major gift was on your birthday."

"Okay?" Louis says, frowning at all of them. 

"Here, Harry again first, I think," Liam says, passing Harry a flat package. Harry rips it open and actually gasps. 

"What?" he asks. 

"The rest are in my trunk," Liam says, passing Louis a large box. Louis' eyes light up, adding this all together.

"So does that mean this is?" he asks, ripping the paper and then beaming and pulling out his jacket. 

"How?" Harry asks.

"Ed was working the day you sold your records, and I knew what you must have wanted the money for," Zayn says. 

"And you sold your coat to Danielle," Liam says. 

"Who flagged down Zayn and me and gave us her discount to get it back," Niall says. 

"I love you all more than I can say," Louis says. 

"Are you going to propose to all of us again?" Liam asks. 

"I was seriously considering it," Louis says. 

"I'm all for it, this is, thanks," Harry says, running his fingers over his record over and over. 

"A holiday marriage, then?" Niall asks. 

"Still in Louis' heart?" Zayn asks. 

"Always in my heart," Louis says, and his tone maybe isn't as light as it should be when he says it, but they all beam at him anyway, because they know the feeling. 

"Is it, can we make this a tradition? I know it's stupid to plan things senior year, but can we try to always do this on Louis' birthday, as long as we can?" Harry asks.

"Buy you two back the things you sold for each other?" Niall asks. 

"No, this. The five of us and gifts and, this," Harry says. Niall grins.

"I knew what you meant," Niall says. 

"It'll go perfectly with our gym floor sleeping in the summer, really," Liam says. Louis beams at him. 

"Yes," Louis says, his voice still a touch more serious than normal. 

"Traditions are good," Zayn says, reaching out for Liam's hand and squeezing it as he does. It's really, part of him is still telling him that senior year in high school is no time to be putting down roots, but the rest of him- the rest of him feels like those roots are pretty damn deep. Deeper every day. Deep enough that maybe, just maybe, they'll be able to stand up to whatever comes between all of them and this moment next year.


End file.
